I went to the OB/gyn today and I love that she is always optimistic, but today's visit depressed me. She is confident I will get pregnant, but I worry about how much of that relies on how financially capable we are for extra measures. She is currently putting me on clomid to regulate my ovulation, so I am following through with the early steps. Although my hormone levels are normal, I have only ovulated twice in the last 4 months, making it harder to conceive. Coupled with my husband's semen analysis, which is mildly abnormal, the two of us lower the chance of conception.
It's difficult thinking ahead when feeling discouraged. But my OB/gyn and I discussed when it was appropriate to re-evaluate my current treatment, infertility options & costs, and success rates. And the whole thing just sucks. The gravity of trying unsuccessfully for a baby alone is harrowing, but it is emotionally exhausting after losing my daughter. It's difficult finding the motivation to plan or make decisions about what should be done to ensure conception. And it is easy to place blame elsewhere.
I think today is a a 30 minute yoga flow day. I included a video in case anyone is feeling the same way.
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